Scrubs, What Have You Done to Me?

So I've been watching Scrubs because it was put on Netflix instance watch and I just finished it yesterday. Besides the show being hilarious in so many ways, and almost as quotable as Seinfeld, J.D.'s morals at the end of the show are actually things that are worth trying to realize in your own life. 
So in clichéd fashion, I complied a list of some of my favorites because I wanted to say something about them but didn't bother thinking up anything new for a method of distribution. Here goes:

•  There is no Shangri-La, you know? Every relationship is messed up. What makes it perfect is if you still want to be there when things really suck.
• You know, when you stop being frightened, time really is on your side. And you can just go on being you. 
•  It's hard to take positive steps, when you've burned the bridge you got to walk across. 
•  It's the kid inside of us that keeps us all from going crazy. 
•  It's funny, I guess sometimes when you do nothing at all, things just have a way of fixing themselves.
• Relationships don't work they way they do on television and in the movies. Will they? Won't they? And then they finally do, and they're happy forever. Gimme a break. Nine out of ten of them end because they weren't right for each other to begin with, and half of the ones who get married get divorced anyway, and I'm telling you right now, through all this stuff I have not become a cynic. I haven't. Yes, I do happen to believe that love is mainly about pushing chocolate covered candies and, y'know, in some cultures, a chicken. You can call me a sucker, I don't care, because I do believe in it. Bottom line: it's couples who are truly right for each other wade through the same crap as everybody else, but the big difference is they don't let it take them down. One of those two people will stand up and fight for that relationship every time. If it's right, and they're real lucky, one of them will say something. 
•  But in the end, the most important thing to accept is that no matter how alone you feel, how painful it may be, with the help of those around you, you'll get through this too. 
• Nothing worth having comes easy. 
•  A person doesn't have to be perfect to be exactly what you need.
• It's funny how our perceptions can be so off. Like when you're searching for a place to fit in and you don't realize you've been there the whole time
• I've been thinking a lot lately about taking chances, and how it's really just about overcoming your fears. Because the truth is, every time you take a big risk in your life, no matter how it ends up, you're always glad you took it
• Maybe the mistake we make is thinking our parents will change. And maybe they did a better job than we give them credit for. And maybe there, amid all the crap they dumped on us, are some things worth keeping. Like a passion for something you never knew you had. Or the ability to constantly surround yourself with people who love you.
•  I think one of the most universal human experiences is feeling alone. You'd never know it, but there's most likely tons of people feeling the exact same way. Maybe because you're feeling abandoned. Maybe because you realize that you aren't as self-sufficient as you thought. Maybe because you know you should've handled something differently. Or maybe because you aren't as good as you thought you were. Either way, when you hit that low point, you have a choice. You can either wallow in self-pity, or you can suck it up. It's your call.
• There are a few things I've always believed in. Flowers are good for any occasion. And nothing is more important than making time for an old friend, especially if the old girl has seen better days. Because even if it breaks your heart to be "just friends," if you really care about someone, you'll take the hit.
•  I don't think people are meant to be by themselves. That's why if you actually find someone you care about, it's important to let go of the little things, even if you can't let go all the way. Because nothing sucks more than feeling all alone, no matter how many people are around.
• here comes a time when every man needs to make a choice, whether it's a professional choice or whether it's a personal choice. In the end, it's about integrity, and it's about chasing after what you really want, even if that means showing you both care a little. And sometimes... well, sometimes you just have to do what's right for your friend, even if it means sacrificing your own happiness. When it comes down to it, you just have to be proud of the decision you make.
• And right then we all realised the value of the romantic gesture, from one person who loves someone, to another.
• I guess it's because we all want to believe that what we do is important, that people hang on our every word, that they care what we think. But the truth is, you should consider yourself lucky if you even occasionally get to make someone, anyone, feel a little better.

Cooking With Michelle Part 2

So after dangerous driving we get back to Michelle's house to try and bake everything. We get into the normal rhythm of cooking where I go to the computer and turn on the Numa Numa song for our ritual dance around the kitchen.

After we get all worked up from that Michelle starts pulling out the pans we need to cook. I had never baked anything besides cookies and brownies so my job was to stir or just watch in amazement. I love cracking eggs so Michelle was kind enough to let me do that. Then I got to stir the ingredients in the bowl. 

As this was my first time making these types of sweets I learned a valuable lesson. The raw mix tastes horrible. Just terrible. Cake mix tastes like bad pudding and I can't even describe the horror of cupcake mix. Brownie mix has given me such a false idea of the taste of these items. It's not fair that cake mix looks so similar to brownie mix and makes me expect it to be good. I forever hate it for that. It's like eating a skittle expecting it to be an M&M. Your face revolts against itself when the taste isn't right. You feel like your tongue is trying to slap you in the face for doing that to it. Not only that, the aftertaste will not leave you alone either. It takes forever to get rid of it. It's something you regret for a week afterwards. I'm cringing just writing about it over a year later. Beware raw cake and cupcake mix. Beware!

To be continued

A Few Good Tears

"It's only after we have lost everything that we are free to do anything."-Tyler Durden

 Have you ever had that day where even if in perspective life isn't that bad, but it feels like everything's wrong? Those days when curling in bed with chocolate and crying is all you can do? These people just get labeled as emo and get scoffed at. I know a person who just says "at least it's not the Holocaust."

I mean is it so bad that we get sad and self absorbed sometimes? Do people really think it's such a bad thing that we break down and let things get to us? Are we bad people if we don't put life in perspective and give up for a day? Are we bad for being sad that we were dumped, or we're in a fight with a good friend and show that we are sad, instead of being glad for what we have, not what we lost? We see it all the time. "Be thankful for what you have, not sad for what you have not," "it's not getting what you want it's wanting what you've got" "big girls don't cry" or even "there's people who's lives are worse than yours, what are you complaining about?" It makes it hard for us to let ourselves feel when people shove this in our faces all the time.

I think it's important for us to sometimes take a day and feel sad about things. It's what helps us then move passed it. When you get the cry out, you can then move on. When people act happy all the time and don't let things out, I think it makes it worse for them. That's when it builds and becomes the ugly gremlin that ruins you. Medically, it's actually possible to die from a broken heart. You can't get passed something like that if you don't let yourself feel the pain and give in to it. Only by giving in can we then grow accustomed to it, and one day stronger than it.

Sadness is like a virus, you have to wait it out. Sure, you can fight it with things, but it will just over come your defenses and grow stronger. You have to subdue it and let it run it's course. Then you get passed it and your body has learned how to fight it.

Sometimes things just need let out to be solved. It's not a matter of burning the bridge, but accepting that it's there and daring to take another route. When you allow yourself to feel the emotions and accept them, you'll find out how strong you actually are and that you can get through this.

Cooking With Michelle Part 1

So one thing that Michelle and I do a lot when I visit her is cook. She actually knows something about food and I'm fascinated by it, so it's always fun. Of course when we're together, there is always shenanigans. While it's impossible for me to remember and write about every happenstance we have done, mostly because I have horrible memory, but also because there's been so many, I decided to do a mini series called as you should have noticed;

So the first incident in the kitchen with Michelle I can remember to relay is last Valentine's Day. By last I mean 2010 not this years. I was bound and determined to make a cake for a friend while we were also going to make cupcakes for our drumline.

So the cooking adventure begins the way almost all of my visits to Michelle's does; a trip to Wal*Mart. This time we also had Zach with us. So in Wal*mart, we can never just go to the food we need. We have to roam around the toys section for a while first. I'm in college and I still love to roam around it. There's just so many fun things in there. The board games, foam swords, magic 8 balls, bubbles, hula hoops, tonka trucks. We just wander around and play with what we can until we get in trouble or bored or remember we're on a mission for sweets.

So we finally get to the food aisle and standing and choosing anything is so hard for us.  We just stand and stare for awhile touching things before we decide.

We eventually manage to choose something, in this case cupcake mix as well as a type of cake mix and then travel back to Michelle's to try and cook. 

To be Continued

A Short Emo moment to sum up my last couple nights.

While it's nothing I can go into, I browsed some pictures by people I don't know to show the inside of my mind. 

"We only see stars in the black of night"-I wish I knew

Why I Shouldn't Play Games Late at Night

So the last few nights I've been up late playing WoW with a good friend, who in fact is the reason I'm playing anyway. He started a character on the area I'm at a little while after I did so that we can play together and so while he was trying to catch up, I've been trying to get really far ahead, but as he's immensely better than me, and I have zero mouse control, he managed to pass me and is now waiting on me.

So last night, the area I was in has a bunch of snakes and dinosaur like creatures that are basically, velociraptors. I had to kill a bunch and catch a bunch of snakes. Now see here's the thing with me and snakes. Even looking at pictures and the fake computer generated ones make me look like this.

I just really hate snakes. So after a night of dealing with this on the game, I made it to bed around 3am. And had the scariest dream that I have had in freaking forever. I don't even know.

So what I remember about it was that I was stuck on an island with a friend, and a group of unrecognizable faces and such. There were palm trees everywhere. And I believe some pine trees as well. From the get go I was scared.

I'm not sure how I got there nor what was going on. I started just running around like an insane person not knowing what to do and looking for my friend cause I could just feel that he was there somewhere. I knew I should probably find him.

While running around looking for him, I found something else. A freaking Tyrannosaurus Rex. Another point about me. In real life, I'm a slow and horrible runner. It's more like watching a penguin waddle than it is running. Now in a dream. It's of course even worse. Upon meeting a T. Rex, I knew what was coming and that it'd be worse. Scared to heck I knew I had to get away but I didn't see the point as I knew the running would be bad. I then had the passing thoughts of stay still, it can't see you. I chose to run like heck. Way to go dreaming me. Great decisions you make. 

So I'm fast waddling through the forest from the T. Rex when I get pulled into a grove by my friend. He's with a huge group of people including my dad. The T. Rex apparently couldn't figure out what happened cause he just wandered away. We all kinda stood around trying to figure out how we got there and then started walking until we found this house. 

Inside we found a woman that was there researching I don't know what. She agreed to let us stay but the men in the group had to go outside and keep a patrol. I was freaking out because I was so sad that my dad was out there and worried about him. We discovered that she had a basement that was really protected and safe in case something happened to the upper levels. I was sitting in the kitchen when two guys started fighting. They decided to solve it by having one guy slice the hand of the other with a small pocket knife. 

Horrible idea. So the guy with the bleeding hand tries to go outside but the women all yell at him to stay inside cause the T. Rex will smell the blood. He stops just in time but places his hand on a branch that everyone just noticed sticking through the open window. Everybody just stares at it. 

And then we run like heck to the basement yelling for the men to come inside. We feel the house start to shake and I'm near a basement window that doesn't seem very safe and I can see his skin. I start freaking out and this is when I woke up. It was kinda dark in the room and I figured it was early but I couldn't move. I could feel my body trying to fall asleep but my mind wouldn't let me. I just laid there scared out of my mind too afraid to fall back into the dream. 

So after checking the time and realizing I still had a half an hour before I had to get up to shower. I got up to shower. I texted my friend for some moral support during my time of need but alas. He was asleep. I showered and watched Glee to feel better. The only thing that comforted me? 

At least I didn't wake up to a zombie apocalypse. 

I hate being sick

I hate being sick. I rarely get sick yet I've managed twice in less than 6 months. That makes me sad. Normally I would just fight through the sickness and go to school and everything but these last two times have been bad enough I just stayed home. Last time it was because of a fever, this time it was because of aches and pains. I missed one class and work but decided that I would go to class the next day. That was a bad idea.

In the morning when I woke up I didn't ache as much. My nose wasn't stuffed. My cough wasn't noticeable. I thought maybe the day would be worth going to. So off I went to class.

The left side of my face just started pulling and hurting like a sneeze was building but it wouldn't come out. When I finally did sneeze it would be at least five in a row but the feeling of a building sneeze STAYS THERE! It drove me crazy. On top of that my face looked really weird because of it. 

I sat through three classes like this. Amazingly nobody asked about the fact one of my eyes looked like I was high and why I was crying out of it too. 

It didn't end with class either. I had to go around looking for teachers to sign credit papers for when I study abroad. None of them mentioned how I looked either so I just sat there listening to them talk and try not to drip snot and tears all over their desks. 

Needless to say it was a very stressful day. I finally made it home and even wrote a term paper. Then my RA came in and gave me an orange since she knew I was sick.